Things I reference regularly

26 Jul

Things I reference and jokes I’ve made about those references that usually go over poorly but some of them I just wrote.

 

1. Eugene Levy’s eyebrows

Size does matter! Just ask Eugene Levy’s eyebrows.

2. The Sleepy’s jingle

Trust Sleepy’s for the rest of your life.  I have trust issues.

3. That time I barked at Tyra

Remember that time I barked at Tyra?

4. The Casey Anthony decision

Is this tweet about the Casey Anthony decision too much?

5. Fracking

Yea, I know a lot of people who care about fracking. (See Alternative definitions of fracking…it is on my blog)

This picture makes very little sense to me.

6. My blog posts

See Alternative definitions of fracking…it is on my blog

7. Not the Bible

Have you read the latest Cosmo? 

I’ve always wanted to own his orgasm.

8. That time I met Billy Mays

Billy Mays. RIP.

9. Going to Quaker high school

I went to Quaker high school…so yeah, I know a thing or two about Quaker high schools. 

I’m the one circled. I’ve aged well though so if you want to date me or something I’m more attractive than that. Email me at zoe@madamezooble.com

10. My brother’s political views

My brother is a Libertarian or something like that…. 

11. People from reality television

Omarosa, [winner of America’s Next Top Model], New York from Flavor of Love, Daisy from Rock of Love

12. Anchorman (I still reference Anchorman)

Milk was a bad choice OR pants party BUT NOT I love lamp…I think we’ve all moved on from I love lamp.

13. Other people’s tweets

I saw this really good tweet once…none of you guys care…

14. Full House

You got it dude! (Alt: What were the names of the twin boys? [Alt alt: How do you spell Uncle Jesse’s last name])

15. The smell of Old Navy

Yo, smells like Old Navy up in this bitch.

16. The smell of Subway sandwich shops

Why do Subway sandwich shops smell like that? AM I RIGHT? Holla.

17. My friend with Tourette’s

My friend has Tourette’s. 

18. ChristianMingle.com

Gonna make a ChristianMingle.com profile, I’m Jewish, isn’t that just hilarious?! 

This hug is extremely awkward.

19. “Party in the USA” by Miley Cyrus

Nodding my head like yeah, moving my  hips like yeah.

20. Being a bully in high school

Remember that time when I spread a rumor that GLAM stood for “girls love African men” because they all hooked up with the 4 black boys that attended my Quaker high school. That was my best rumor.

I’m the one circled. I’ve aged well though so if you want to date me or something I’m more attractive than that. Email me at zoe@madamezooble.com

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